Let us see what is already over from the point of view of self-criticism. What is better to avoid.
1. When you use your mistakes and shortcomings as an excuse
While it’s sometimes nice to remind your partner that certain things or activities are not our strong point, using self-criticism as an excuse and a way to avoid certain things may not pay off.
A well-functioning partnership is built on give and take. At the same time, part of giving is also doing something that you don’t want to, that you don’t enjoy or that you are not very good at. Of course, you shouldn’t be forced into it, but you shouldn’t make excuses either.
Constantly backing down or using self-deprecating excuses to avoid things, or even blaming the other person for making you do things you don’t really want to, can literally be “deadly” for a relationship. No counterpart has a chance to withstand all this in the long run.
Does criticism bring you to your knees? Learn to face it
Relationships and sex
Therefore, if you care about the other person, be open to him and try to find a compromise so that the other person does not feel that you are just making excuses and that you are not at all able and willing to retreat from your comfort.
2. When you are not willing to learn from your mistakes
It is also not good if you are not able or willing to work on yourself and learn from your mistakes or weaknesses.
Of course, it is not always possible to get rid of all the shortcomings. But you can try to fix at least what you can.
On the other hand, no one should ever criticize you for the family you were born into or for your appearance. These thongs don’t belong in any relationship and there’s really no point in changing for such a person.
3. When you are emotionally self-critical
Everyone has some weaknesses, but how you work with them is very important. Worrying too much about them can be just as bad as feeling sorry for them.
“If you’re constantly down because of your own weaknesses and shortcomings, and you expect the other person to constantly encourage you and convince you that you’re much better than you feel, then know that it’s very exhausting and few people can stand it in the long run,” he explains relationship expert Pamela Aloia in her book Current is only but a moment.
Life with the eternal critic or Whatever I do, everything is wrong
Relationships and sex
Men sometimes tend to be princes who want to protect their fragile and delicate princess, but that doesn’t mean they will do so forever. Simply, no one has the energy to be the one the other person leans on for the rest of their life without being supported by the other person from time to time.
If you want to have a nice and long-term relationship, never put all the weight of your own life on the other person for a long time, try to do something about your moods yourself. Don’t be afraid to reach out to experts and work with them on your gloomy moods and self-confidence.
4. When you start criticizing your partner for everything bad that happens to you
Criticism generally begets more criticism. So if you start looking at your relationships through the same lens as your own failures and negative feelings, then it is obvious that the eternal criticism of everything and everyone will literally bury your relationship.
Of course, there are objective reasons for criticism, but nothing should be exaggerated. In addition, healthy constructive self-reflection and the ability to openly communicate with others about things and strive for mutual balance must always be present.
Most of the time there is room for improvement, but in addition to the weaknesses, it is necessary to realize the strengths and see the good not only in yourself, but also in others.
To err is human, learn to forgive – even yourself
Relationships and sex
A slow but sure relationship killer? Criticism
Relationships and sex
